To Pursue Happiness

Today I hold sadness. There’s a certain funk that rolls around like a plague. I catch it, I heal it; I catch it, I heal it. No one controls my mood but me- no one controls my outlook & attitude, but me. Then someone tell me why I am feeling so out of control. Why can’t I tell myself, this is what’s right, right now. You’ll do what you want soon enough. You’ll be who you want to be. I can’t let the cube define me- but it is. It’s sucking the life out of me, and cheating my time. Though I think… 35 hours a week out of 168: It’s not even that bad. Let’s see I sleep 56 hours… work 35… You’d think the left over 77 would be enough for me. It’s not. So far it has been an absurd amount of time for me to settle with.

Get out, get out, get out. It’s running through my head like they’re the last words I’ll ever mutter. My heart beats faster thinking I’ve got 7 hours left in this chair- it’s nearly deafening. Thumping into my ear drums and wavering my palms. I already know I’m unhappy- point and match; do I accept it and learn to live with it, or change it and be unrealistic?

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Though mildly upset, I settle into my rain boots for a weekend of wool socks and puddle jumping. I could hardly open the blinds knowing what the world looked like on the other side. So much of that grey I long to forget. The trickle of droplets seems unusually agitating; I love this weather- what’s making it unbearable? Is it the mere fact that my mind distances itself so far from Monday morning I forget how to put energy into the present moment? That must be it. I’ll settle for a homemade recycling center.

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I promised Caramel Apple Tales.. here you have them.

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We chose to use Kraft Caramels, rather then making the caramel like my previous recipe listing had called for. Note: Trust the package to number of apple ratio given on packages =] Or be stuck with 7 extra bags!

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Gala, Honeycrisp & Granny Smith; All relatively tart & crisp!

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Cakepop sticks- I worried whether they would hold, worked like a charm.

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Roll in your caramel- it’s suggested to wait 30-45 seconds before rolling in toppings. If too runny and hot still the toppings may slide off… but then, who wouldn’t want a chocolate/caramel/walnut disc =]

If you’re going to do melt chocolate put your apple in the fridge before wrapping… in fact, put them all in the fridge before wrapping, it will cut down on stick-age!

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The Finished Product!

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To Come Tomorrow…. Gluten Free Basil/Oregano Personal Pizzas!

“I will accept and change the way I think, I will put less pressure on myself to fit a mold, I will see myself as an individual and have faith that all will mend with time. While accepting the year of the cubicle, I will seek opportunities to grow. I will decide steps to be taken next and plan on the pursuit of happiness.” 

Oct. 15, 2012

 

To Love The Autumn Air

As Autumn is approaching… actually Saturday the 22nd is officially the first day of Autumn, I am thrilled, glorified, ecstatic, pleased, humbled, anxious, hopeful- everything good under the stars- Autumn takes me there. I’m not sure if it’s the crisp air as it hits my cheeks in the morning, when I know it’s just cold enough to need a thicker sweater, but I’ll lose it by noon-time. Maybe it’s the sound of the wind and the leaves falling. If I weren’t stuck in the suburbia life- oh the joy that would consume me to the brim! I’ve found ways to enjoy this Autumn, though stuck un-with nature, I will prevail.

A pair of these

The sound of these

The taste of this

The joy of these

The warmth of these

The joy of this day

Some produce from here

A stroll through here

And lastly the comforts of scarves, flannel, boots and mittens. A hot cup of cider in your hand starring out through the leaves, the temperature sitting around 58, it is most definitely all I need to relax.

The colors relax me the most. How splendid is it that we can recreate the colors brought out by nature herself. I can put leaf-yellow, red, orange or purple on my own walls. I love simplicity, but thank God for paint departments.

Today I’m enjoying all of this. Most exciting moment- there are so many more leaves to turn from green.

To Make My Vows

Another Monday, Another Week in Another Month of Another Year. Why do I always have to say another like I’m preparing myself for battle?! Enough is enough. Let it be known that on this Monday I’ve decided to write my vows… to my future-self. (And yes, even my tomorrow-self is included, and my day-after-tomorrow-self).

I vow to always remain true to my hearts desire; to culture the earth and all it has to offer. I will can more food, make more of my own clothing and decorate my home with twigs. More vinyl will spin in my living room and I’ll spend more time outside watching leaves fall. Hours spent baking will increase as I try new recipes. I will stress less about the appearance of my home and stress more about how much time I haven’t been spending in nature. I will call my grandparents more, catch up with friends and give more effort towards my cat. I will put energy into my relationship. Energy that may have been spent otherwise fretting about things that will gray my hair if I allow it. I will spend more time watching old movies and wearing wool socks. I promise to visit my brother and sister more, while building relationships with their spouses. My time spent stressing over bills, deadlines and chores will be no more; in fact I will delight in these things! I will delight in the fact that these things don’t stress me out! What a feat it will be when I learn to let go. How easy it will be for me to walk past these distractions with my head held high; they have no effect on me, I win this time. So I will put on that infamous Fleetwood Mac Vinyl and let my mind be healed by a dream of worry-less days.